My Date Lab Questionnaire (in entirety)

I've posted a few of these answers in the past, but I decided to just go ahead and throw the whole thing up here. Enjoy...

The Stats

Name: Alejandra

Rarely is someone living in D.C. actually from D.C. So how long have you been here? Where are you from originally?
I’m originally a Jersey girl. I was born in NY and lived there when I was a kid, but spent most of my life in North Jersey. I came to DC for college (GWU) and fell in love with the city. I will have been here a total of five years this coming August.

Is there anything important that we should know about your dating preferences?
I’d prefer to not be paired with anyone older than 30…or with anyone who is a vegetarian.

Do you:

Smoke? I smoke cigarettes occasionally. I’d say about a pack a month.

Drink? Yes

Work out?
I do yoga with a kind of self-loathing sense of irony about it. I don’t like the kind of New Age-y lifestyle that it's associated with, but I really love the stretches and the way it makes my body feel. I just wish people weren’t so weird about it sometimes—I’m not into the whole “edamame-eating-third eye-namaste” kind of crap. I also have a WSC membership and force myself to go on a fairly regular basis.

Have pets? If so, what kind?
I have a cat, but I don't like her and I’d really prefer a dog. I sort of got the cat on a whim last summer and now I feel like I’m stuck with her. We're currently coexisting in a kind of uneasy détente. I won’t go as far as saying that her days with me are numbered, but you never know…

Have kids? If so, how old? No

Attend religious services?
Occasionally, yes. I’d like to attend more regularly but I just really haven’t found a church that I feel really comfortable in yet. Granted, I must admit that I haven’t put as much effort into finding a church as I probably should.

Own a car?
No

Eat meat?
Voraciously



Weird questions meant to teach us something about you


Quick—what’s the first thing you do when you get up in the morning?
During the week I turn off the alarm, check the time, then roll over, and go back to sleep. On weekends I hang around in bed reading or daydreaming, and then I get up and decide what to make for breakfast or call a friend and plan to go out for brunch.


What’s the last book you read? The last song you couldn’t get out of your head?
I’m usually reading about 4 or 5 books at a time. The most recent one that I completed was The Fermata by Nicholson Baker—very sexy.

Song: Led Zeppelin, “Trampled Under Foot”. Oh, and that song from the Sony HandyCam commercial (you know, the one with the little girl dressed like an aardvark and the Bluetooth microphone… “I know that you’re with me…through the storm…”).

If you could be a superhero, what super-power would you want? Why?
Actually, I think I'd rather date a superhero than be one. I'd like to be the superhero's girlfriend. You know, he comes home late after a long day of doing super-things and I have dinner waiting and we talk about those people he rescued in the mudslide or the baby that he caught falling out a window. We joke around about his nemesis (who is a complete idiot). I show him the chapter I wrote and he offers suggestions (I'm a best-selling writer in this fantasy). I patch up a rip in his costume. Then we curl up and watch a movie, have super-sex, I fall asleep in his super-arms. Occasionally we go to super-functions (award ceremonies, movie openings, etc.). We get photographed by the tabloids. I go on The View and talk about what it's like to live with a superhero. We have cute half-superhero, half-Puerto Rican kids...

But ok, that wasn't the question. So, my first instinct would be to say something like the power to heal myself, but then I think about what that would mean. I would probably live much longer than everyone that I love, which seems kind of sad and lonely. Then I thought about how incredible it would be to read people’s minds, but the repercussions of that just seem a bit too dangerous. It would be far too easy to manipulate people with that kind of an advantage, and I mean do I really, genuinely, honestly want to know what people are thinking about me all the time? No. Definitely not. So I think I’ll just have to go with something a bit more prosaic (in terms of super powers) like “the ability to fly.” And the "why" is so that I can stop spending so much money on DC cab fares.

You took a three-hour tour with some friends, and now you’re stranded on this island. What three foods do you wish you’d remembered to pack? Three films? Three people?
What kind of a crazy suitcase is this?

Foods: Oranges (to prevent scurvy), Lasagna, and red wine.

Films: Wet Hot American Summer, Goodfellas, and something I haven’t seen yet—figure if I’m going to have to watch it over and over again, I might as well start fresh.

People: (assuming that I’m already with my best friends) my mom, my dad, and my little brother. I’d rather have the people that I love with me than some random famous person—although I considered bringing Oprah along because leaving her stranded on a desert island is probably the only way to stop her madness…


Imagine you’re pitching your dating history as a TV show. Tell us about it.
Smart, sexy, 20-something who gets hit on incessantly, but invariably falls in love with the guy that only wants to be her friend. Bit of a flirt, kind of a wild girl in college, never had a relationship that lasted longer than 5 months—not because she didn’t want it, just never met the right guy. Really great at being a friend; not really sure what it means to be a girlfriend. Might come off a bit cynical, but deep down she believes in love and soul mates and is waiting for it to be her turn.


What’s the first drink you’d order in a bar? What are the chances you’d then start talking to the stranger next to you and end up making a new friend?
Depends on the bar, but usually a Ketel One Tonic. I recently discovered a drink called the Moscow Mule—it’s basically just ginger ale and vodka with a twist of lime, but I like it because it’s served in a martini glass and has a bit of history about it (apparently it was the first vodka cocktail to gain popularity in the US).

The chances that I’ll talk to the person next to me are very high as I have a knack for talking to strangers (never really learned that lesson in kindergarten). However, the chances that he/she will become a new friend are very low. I’m very picky and have spent a long time cultivating my current friendships—you have to be pretty clever for me to let you into my circle…


What’s the first thing people notice when they walk into your home?
The colors…it’s a very bright apartment with a Moroccan theme so they definitely see the colors first—a lot of reds, oranges, and greens. I painted a mural on one of the doors are there are lanterns and candles and swooping bits of fabric. I guess it’s a bit opium den-like.

When were you happiest?
The weeks I spent in Guatemala building houses.

Those nights when I stayed up all night with my best friend drinking wine and just talking about everything.

The 8 months I lived in Tuscany.

This one day on the beach in Puerto Rico when I just spent hours floating in the water watching the sun set.

In what ways would you say you are very D.C.? In what ways aren’t you?
I think DC is a smart city. It’s a well-read, well-spoken, international kind of city, and I am all those things. I think it’s a friendly place and a lot more accessible than places like NY.

I think the bullshit is what gets to me. If necessary, I can dish it out with the best of them, but I prefer not to. I’m more of a New Yorker in that way—I’d rather be honest and piss you off than lie just to be polite. And I’m not really into the “scene” here sometimes. It's so lame. I’m not the kind of girl that you’ll see dancing with sketchy guys at 1223 or waiting for someone with a boat to pick me up at the Waterfront. I’m not impressed by journalists or politicians or the Hill scene. 8 out of 10 times I prefer to hang out at home with some good friends, a bottle or two of wine, and a great playlist going on the iPod.

Think about the last couple of people you dated (and, yes, “only once” counts). How/where did you meet those people?
The last three guys I dated I met through a friend of mine. Very rarely do I go out with anyone I meet randomly at a bar or anywhere like that. I tend to be most attracted to the things that you can’t really gauge well when the music is loud and the lights are low.



C’mon, brag a little: What makes you a good catch?
I think I’m a pretty cool chick with a strong sense of adventure. I’m a smart girl and I love to laugh. I’m passionate, and always up for new things. I went to culinary school in Italy and love to cook for the man in my life. I’m fluent in Spanish and Italian, have traveled all over the world, but I really love it here at home.


Vaguely embarrassing questions about who you date


So—what’s your type? (And don’t tell us you don’t have one—that’s such a cop-out.)
Physically, I like tall men with dark hair, fair or tan skin, strong features (like a prominent nose or jaw), and a great smile. I don’t like skinny guys, nor do I like guys that are too “beefy.” I just like average or slightly muscular guys. Pretty much every guy I’ve ever dated has been either Italian, Jewish, Irish, or a combination of the above. I must admit to having a weakness for NY/NJ accents…

In terms of personality, I love brilliant and nerdy, but outgoing guys. You know, the clever, witty, slightly smart-alecky ones with a quirky sense of humor. I love sarcasm. I also love when guys are sweet, but I don’t tolerate sappiness…it just makes me feel uncomfortable and is probably the quickest way to send me running.

I’m Republican, but pretty much all the guys I date are Democrats—I tend to have more in common with them than with the really conservative guys.


What’s his/her theme song? You know, the one that plays when the person walks into any room.
Hmm…I think I prefer a man who doesn't have a theme song because that would be especially inconvenient those times that we're a few minutes late for a movie and trying to slip in as unobtrusively as possible.

What I would like, however, is the kind of guy who, when asked, would pick something by Sinatra or Dean Martin. You know, that sort of old school cool, classy, a little jazzy, cigarette hanging out of the side of your mouth kinda guy. So maybe he's not actually that way, but it's the way he imagines himself sometimes and that's actually better for me, because I'm not really the way that I imagine myself to be either.

Pie-in-the-sky time: In your wildest dreams, whom (or what kind of person) would you like to date? An anthropologist who makes a mean paella? An actress/humanitarian who flies her own plane? Jack from Lost? Don’t hold back.
Basically, I just want a male version of me—and I want him to look like Dermot Mulroney.

Actually, I was watching the movie Prime the other day and totally fell for the guy that Uma Thurman dates in that movie…the cute, quirky wit, sexy boyish looks, NY accent, with an artsy side. I love that. Other options: Mr. Darcy as played by Colin Firth, Cary Grant’s character in The Philadelphia Story.

Imagine your date writes you that s/he is “equally comfortable in jeans or in formal attire.” Your reaction?

“Could you be more cliché?"



What was you best date ever? What was your worst?
The best dates are those when you just click…when we can talk and talk for hours and it feels like minutes. When you feel like you spend a lot of the time just laughing or nodding and going “I know! Me too!” That’s what I love. It doesn’t matter what we’re doing…it’s about the connection.

The worst date was a coffee date I had with a guy who spent the entire time telling me his “get rich schemes” only pausing momentarily to make creepy comments like “Wow I really didn’t believe in angels until I saw you.” I was like “Really!? Are you really saying this?” I spent the whole time edging away from him on the bench we were sitting on—I practically fell off.


What hobbies/interests/outlooks/passions would you hope to share with your date? In what ways would you hope s/he differed from you?
I definitely want someone who likes to read and who would like to roam around bookstores with me. Someone with a passion for food is important because I love to cook and to eat out and would obviously want to share that with the person I’m dating. I’d like to meet someone with a strong faith because that’s an important part of my life and it’s something that I would like to share with my partner. I’m not a very outdoorsy person—not really into the hiking, camping kind of scene, but I do like to go sailing. I love being in and or near the water. Someone with an interest in languages and travel is also very important. I love games, movies, and puzzles. I like inane humor. I prefer lounges and chill bars over loud dance clubs. I love going to concerts and baseball games. Also, I’m kind of a nerdy tech girl…so someone with at least moderate interest in that would be great.

In terms of differing from me, I think I would like someone who can teach me things—someone who will inspire me to grow and push me to go after my dreams. Someone who respects me for my strengths, but who will also be there for me during the vulnerable times.


What’s the worst reason you’ve ever broken up with someone? (We’re all seriously petty at times.)
I once canceled a date with a man who used the word “conversate” in an e-mail because, well, it’s not a word.


In your world, what features or characteristics would normally rule someone out as a dating possibility?
A nasty attitude, close-mindedness, a lack of appreciation for art, music, or literature, bad teeth, vegetarianism, poor grammar, sloppy dress, shortness, a mustache.