New Jersey likes it raw

I'm home for the weekend and was sitting at the kitchen table this morning leafing through the glossy pages of "Bergen County: The Magazine."

That's right, kids. It's no longer just the best county in New Jersey, it's now also a magazine... What'll they think of next?

Anyway, tucked in between pictures of NJ society wives and their Italian husbands I came across the following ad for Flirt Sushi Lounge in Allendale (naturally, I ripped it out and ran straight to the scanner):

Mi-so horny soup? Sexpresso? It's like they came up with the concept during lunchtime in a middle school cafeteria. The full menu also includes such tasty gems as the "Viagra" (2 hand rolls - uni, ikura, salmon, tuna, quail egg), the Octopussy Delight, Big Balls, and the Latin Lover (fatty tuna, yellowtail, avocado, mango). And if you're not a coffee drinker, don't worry, they have "Horny Green Tea." I guess when in doubt, just add "horny."

Even more entertaining than the menu is the "Under 17, No Flirting Without a Parent" warning. The reason? "Due to potentially "sexy" language, children under 17 must be accompanied by a parent."

Potentially sexy? I really don't think there's any danger of that...